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(no subject) [Mar. 10th, 2007|08:29 pm]
I spent all my money on drugs and couldn't afford to fly
I took a Greyhound bus, you and your brat sat next to me
It wouldn't shut up, so I lit it on fire
For 30 seconds it was louder; then it shut up

You came back from the bathroom and smelled something burning
You realized it was your baby and I started to laugh
You asked the driver to pull over, but he laughed at you too
You yelled at me, so I roasted some marshmellows on your kid

- "I Lit Your Baby On Fire", written by Seth Putnam
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(no subject) [Mar. 10th, 2007|02:21 pm]
"Remember there is a big difference between kneeling down and bending over"

~ Frank Zappa

"We must question the story logic of having an all-knowing all-powerful God, who creates faulty Humans, and then blames them for his own mistakes."

~ Gene Roddenberry
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(no subject) [Mar. 9th, 2007|09:05 pm]
kill women - die
kill women - die
kill women - die

- "Kill Women", written by Seth Putnam
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Look About You! [Mar. 6th, 2007|12:46 pm]
A purple dog casts an orange shade,
A black moon hangs in a silver sky,
My arms bake white in the brown sunlight
And I feel sounds with my eye.

Fish with feathers swarm the sea
And convex caves build the liquid land;
These great whales and a horse with scales
Dance on the scarlet sand.

We each live in a wonderland;
A blue to you is red to me,
A shade is seen, and we call it green -
I wonder what you see?

I know my world. It bores me so!
And I must bear it until I die,
While your every day is a land of fey -
And you're as bored as I!

- Theodore Sturgeon, 1940
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(no subject) [Mar. 5th, 2007|08:21 am]
Do not sleep, sleeping beauty. Listen to the voice of your Truelove. He skips a rigadoon. He loves you so. He is a poet. Can you hear him? Is he just sniggering? No, he adores you, sweet Beauty! He skips another rigadoon and catches a cold. Don't you want to love him? He is a poet, though, an old poet!

- Erik Satie, from "Thoughts Before Last", Aubade.
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The Only Love Song That Won't Lie To You [Mar. 2nd, 2007|08:31 am]
When this kiss is over it will start again.
It will not be any different, it will be exactly the same.
It's hard to imagine that nothing at all
could be so exciting, could be so much fun.
Heaven is a place where nothing every happens.

- "Heaven", by Talking Heads, specifically David Byrne, I guess.
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A Bit of Fry [Mar. 1st, 2007|04:14 am]

"I think it was Donald Mainstock, the great amateur squash player, who pointed out how lovely I was. Until that time I think it was safe to say that I had never been aware of my own timeless brand of loveliness. But his words smote me, because of course I am lovely in a fluffy, moist kind of a way; indeed, how could I be otherwise? I walk, let's be splendid about this, in a lightly scented cloud of gorgeousness that is quite partial to being quite simply terrific.
The secret of smooth, almost shiny loveliness, the order of which we are discussing in this simple, frank, creamy-soft way, doesn't reside in oils, unguents, balms, ointments, creams, astringents, milks, moisturisers, liniments, lubrications, embrocations or balsalms. To be divine for one noble moment, it resides, and I mean this in a pink, slightly special way, in one's attitude of mind. To be gorgeous and high and true and fine and fluffy and moist and sticky and lovely all one has to do is believe one is gorgeous and high and true and fine and fluffy and moist and sticky and lovely, and I believe it of myself, tremulously at first, and then with mounting heat and passion because, stopping off to be super again, I am so often told it. And that's the secret, really."

"Hold the newsreader's nose squarely, waiter, or friendly milk will countermand my trousers."

"A potty marinade in my dildo?!?! Have you run mad, woman?"

"If history has taught us one thing, it's that the battle of Agincourt was in 1415."

"...Well I'm aroused every morning by a very insistent cock..."


"People are often mistaking me for Luther Vandross."

-Stephen Fry (on A Bit of Fry and Laurie)
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Politics, For When Politics Is Not Needed [Feb. 28th, 2007|10:56 pm]
"I feel like a refugee. The moment I decided not to be part of the mainstream I was told that I was not a part of my country anymore."

"There were threats. People said if I brought my wife here we'd be in danger. Even my friends said that. They say I am a traitor."

"It makes me wonder whether I want to be a Palestinian any more. Some see me as some sort of Israeli envoy. It's a shit feeling."

- Osama Zaatar, a muslim Palestinian who married a Jewish Israelie, on their marriage.

The saddest thing you will ever read, From the BBC.
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USA! USA! USA! [Feb. 27th, 2007|11:31 am]
“During the Cold War, a group of Russian journalists toured the United States. On the final day of their visit, they were asked by their hosts for their impressions. ‘I have to tell you,’ said their spokesman, ‘that we were astonished to find after reading all the newspapers and watching TV, that all the opinions on all the vital issues were by and large, the same. To get that result in our country, we imprison people, we tear out their fingernails. Here, you don’t have that. What’s the secret? How do you do it?"

- John Pilger, in an address at Columbia University on 14 April, 2006
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(no subject) [Feb. 24th, 2007|08:17 pm]
From what I have seen the steps to becoming a fashion designer are as follows:
1. Be homosexual
2. Act as if your homosexuality is the totality of your existence.
3. Glue some crap onto clothes. Call it art.
4. Have hissy fits at random intervals because nobody else understands your "art."
5. Ensure that the clothes you "design" are so far out that wearing them would completely ostracize you from society. Never wear those clothes yourself. Only wear torn t-shirts in layers and a flock of seagulls haircut.
6. Profit.

- Schmarmbly
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